What a time to be alive. The sun is shining; thank you “global warming”. There seems to be a constant torrential down pour in southern California, who knew. And I’m 14 days into 30. The world is changing. Yet my unemployment has not. For no other reason than I choose to. I have zero interest in setting up an interview, I find them to be so tedious now. There was a time I thoroughly enjoyed meeting people and talking about myself. Four start up jobs later I am emotionally exhausted. Need to switch things up!
I lived a ridiculously beautiful life with zero regard for where it would lead. Made friends with the hopes of longevity but watched it crumble in front of me. Worked dead end jobs blinded by an imaginary outlet. Did a lot of questionable things for the thrill of an adventure. All of which I intend to keep doing but with a purpose. Overcoming my innate fear of failure.
Changing your lifestyle starts with a mantra. A word, or slogan repeated over and over again to keep the distracted you, more focused. This year, I have chosen “Mission 30 vs 20. No, this is not an episode of Celebrity Death Match. My new self isn’t going to beat my old self with an over the hill pinata. I am still in the ring, ready for another fight, just a bit more prepared to miss all those heavy hits!
The day of the Superbowl, my team won for the sixth time my lifetime. Five other times I swore I would see the parade. Five other times I promised my brother I would take him. Five other times I missed it. This year was different. This year I made a vow to myself that every action needed a reaction. If I drunkenly say I am going to do something than I have no other choice but to follow through.
Two days later, at 4:30 in the morning I packed up the car and drove five hours to Boston with my brother and grandmother in tow. With road closure ahead we parked a few towns over, and waited with the rest of the fans. Trolley after Trolley passed us by, Patriot fans packed in like sardines. Ten trolleys later and the track is derailed. What are the odds of that right? Welcome to my more defined life that just flew off the tracks. Any who back to our story. The parade was about to start and we had to LYFT it across town with a guy who knew nothing of Boston! Ave Maria!! We finally arrived only to catch the last few minutes. It was a really short parade! I promised my brother a show, immediately we ran 15 blocks to get in front of the parade, in the process I lost my Grandmother in the crowd. Over a million people located at the Boston Commons, phones, of course down, and there I was, smack dab between this once in a lifetime experience and never seeing my grandmother again.
Do not judge me, I saw the parade. I had to.
Fifteen minutes later, blue red & white, everywhere! “How to find abuela”, my brother asked. I had no clue. I must have asked a hundred police officers when it occurred to me. Before I ran off, I told her to follow the crowd straight until she couldn’t anymore. Guess where I found her? Following the yellow brick road straight. I must say I am a terrible but genius sitter.
We all made it home. The End.
February is a short month, but it seems to be the most important one of them all. A groundhog decides our future apparel decisions. A day of love can turn into a day of hate if not planned properly. It seems to be someone’s birthday everyday! Day nineteen and I have driven up the east coast, thrown a disco themed birthday party, and plunged into a frozen lake. All moments I said I would do once upon a time.
Last year, I attended the Greenwood Lake Winter Carnival pregnant and watched person after person jump into this ice cold body of water. At the time my child was slowly dying inside of me that I almost considered reviving him with a splash of water. Obviously, I didn’t. That day I told myself I would be back, nude if they let me. They did not. As the months rolled by, I always kept an eye out for this upcoming polar bear plunge. We moved from the city but going back never left my mind. The day came, the sun smiling down on me and the wind well it was pretty chilly! I had my bag packed with towels, extra clothes everything but shoes! Dum Dum Dum.
Before I could build up the courage to jump, I needed my favorite meal. Fish tacos from Mexicanzingo. This was a bad idea. We spent so much time at the restaurant, I never thought about the logistics of checking in. Twenty minutes before “operation freeze your tits”, I walk into a tent with half naked men & women ready to take on the challenge. As for me? I was alone and a rookie. People were chugging beers, putting on costumes and oh wearing water shoes. There I was a fish out of water, literally. Jumping in with no shoes, was a BIG No No. It was either go with the shoes I had on or miss out on the event I planned for a year. What do you think I did?
Combat boots on my feet, my husband cheering me on by the sidelines as I paraded through the mud. He thought about doing it until we showed up and quickly changed his mind. I mean, the lake was completely frozen, so I get him. My mother showed up to support me, but she never got a chance to see me. Remember I told you eating the fish tacos was a bad idea. I felt bad for her, she missed my brother’s game, drove thirty minutes to see me for two seconds only to get Mexican food revenge. My brother hexed her, I’m sure of it. As I was saying, hundreds of people there to watch us plunge to our deaths. I mean really, this could have been a serious hospitalizing situation and every one is in the background cheering us on. Man, I love America.
You never really understand the movie Titanic, and why it was so vital for Rose to share the door with Jack, until you are fully submerged in melted ice. I was in there for a second that felt like hours. It was magical. This coming from a girl who takes long hot showers daily! I did it! I could have lost a toe, but I made it, and with a snap of a finger it was over. There was no need to be nervous or afraid, I had spent more time talking about it then actually plunging.
At that moment, it had all made sense. This was me. A woman exploding with adventure. A fearless warrior of my own self doubt. If I could drive five hours to see a football player, or an hour to dip into an ice bath. What else was I able to do? Can I take over the world? Yes, but first I need to get paid.
Love More, Peace More and Roar More.
Your Newly Uncovered Fearless Spirit Guide,